Last year, many were… perplexed, to say the least, when certain fans singled out Thanos as the hottest figure to appear in ‘Avengers: Infinity War’Josh Brolin was nearly unrecognizable under hundreds of pounds of virtual CGI purple muscle, but it was that faux muscle that seemed most appealing to fans.  In weeks, Mike Mignola’s ‘Hellboy’ returns to the big screen with ‘Stranger Things’ stud David Harbour in the lead role, and it would make perfect sense for this lumbering red behemoth to get those same Thanos self-shippers stirring in the bathing suit area.  And to Hellboy’s credit, his visual appearance is achieved through makeup and practical effects rather than CGI.  But Harbor has some bad news– Hellboy can’t do it with humans.


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During a set visit, Harbour told JoBlo.com:

“I mean, he is destined to be the beast of the apocalypse. And I think one of our goals is to justify the temptations of that destiny in terms of the creation of a world, where you know, as a demon, he might be accepted, and as a monster, he might be accepted, that he doesn’t feel in this world.  The other thing that we explore somewhat is — I mean, one of the interesting things to me about the Guillermo del Toro movies was that he had a love interest, right? And she was like a fire starter, and but I just think that Hellboy can’t have a human being. He probably can’t have sex with a human being because it would probably end disastrously, because of his demonic parts or whatever. So I just feel like what I wanted to explore was that loneliness, and you know, there’s the temptations that you have to, if you do create a darker world as the beast of the apocalypse, you can have sex. You can have a girlfriend. You can live your life. But to live in the human world and to protect humanity, you have to sacrifice some of your nature, and your actual nature, as opposed to this concept of destiny, just that your actual nature somewhat gets sacrificed.”

So despite the presence of Liz Sherman (Selma Blair) in the first two movies, Harbour doesn’t think that Hellboy can actually have relations with a human without disastrous consequences.  It’s a similar conundrum as that facing Angel from ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer’ and is far amplified from the struggle Edward had with wanting to get down with Bella in ‘Twilight’.  (He was just worried about her safety, not the fate of the entire world.)  This is also reminiscent of the struggle of the ‘Teen Titans” Raven, who couldn’t give in to any emotions lest she unleash her father, the demon overlord Trigon.

But somehow, I think the “forbidden” nature of knockin’ cloven boots with Hellboy might make it even more enticing.

Would You Have Sex With Hellboy?

Directed by Neil Marshall, ‘Hellboy’ hits theaters on April 12th, 2019.  It is Rated R, presumably not for sex.