The following is part of a series pitting the merits and abilities of similar characters against each other. We open with a disclosure of the personal bias of the author then outline some ground rules and end with an example of how a fight between the two might unfold.
Ground rules: KITT is driven by Michael Knight and the Batmobile is driven by the Dark Knight. The KITT in use is the original series car. The Batman and Batmobile in question is from the Tim Burton films. I’m going a little retro with this one. The streets of some deserted, neutral city will be the fight’s venue. Neither combatant has previous knowledge of the area.
Personal bias: Batman is by far my favorite character of the two, however, I have seen every episode of the Hoff’s best series. I’d rather drive KITT than the Batmobile just to have someone to talk to and, when lazy, drive for me.
Fight! They begin driving through the city, approximately one mile away from each other when KITT detects the Batmobile and alerts Michael. Batman picks up on his adversary’s motion on his radar.
Batman estimates KITT’s plan of attack based on their current trajectories. He guesses that he will beT-boned in the next intersection if he continues the present course. Continues he does, but just before the intersection Batman hits the brakes and fires a cable into the opposite traffic light post. KITT spies the trap and Michael engages the thrusters to leap over the cable and speeds off perpendicular to Batman’s location.
Batman takes off to follow KITT only to find that he can longer locate it on radar. KITT is jamming his electronics. Batman attempts to override, but knows that it will take time. His car’s weaponry is temporarily crippled.
In the rearview, he spots KITT peeling out around the corner about a block back. Batman circles back to face him and charges forward.
Michael wasn’t expecting a chicken fight. Normally, he would only fear for the opposing driver using such a tactic, but KITT’s analysis of the Batmobile’s steel plating shows it could do significant damage to KITT. He isn’t willing to accept that loss. At the last second, he swerves out of the way and collides with a fire hydrant and levels a subway stop–taking minor damage. “This guy’s crazy,” thinks Michael Knight.
Batman smirks as he glances back to see KITT attempt to recover. It becomes a full-blown smile when the flickering lights of the dash indicate his systems are back on-line. He doubles back around the block to once again engage his enemy.
The Batmobile speeds towards the city’s commercial district, unable to locate KITT. Batman deduces that KITT must be in some stealth mode and is surely not moving at any great pace. He expects an ambush.
Just then the radar pings, registering that KITT is right on top of him. With a powerful boost, Michael launches his car into the Batmobile’s side. Batman’s call for “Shields!” has enough time to raise his armored shell to about 75% of it’s total protective effectiveness. Both cars are immobilized.
The Batmobile’s overhead door slides half-open before it gets stuck on its own shards of twisted metal. Batman emerges ominously. He climbs down to KITT’s ajar driver’s side door and pulls out Michael Knight. Rattled, but still aware, Knight lashes out at Batman who blocks the first two sloppy hits and catches the third and forth. With both hands trapped in Batman’s vice-like grip, Michael resorts to spitting in the face of his captor. One head butt later, the fight is over.
Results: Batman wins, but at the cost of his ride. No major loss considering the Batmobile has been destroyed in most of his films and Bruce Wayne has plenty of money.
Think I should have gave KITT more or a chance? Feel free to discuss in the comments.
