As the resident Mistress of Horror here at, this may not come as a shock, but I’m a serious die hard fan of all things Ryan Murphy (well maybe not ‘Glee’ but I guess you can’t win em’ all). When this humble author of the ‘American Horror Story’ recaps (those will be coming in hot starting Oct. 8th so set your phasers to ‘read’), was tapped to start recapping ‘Scream Queens‘ you can only imagine how tickled I was.  Honest to Blog this is more of a PSA to stop whatever it is your doing and glue your eyeballs to the TV screen and marathon the 3 hours of one of the most refreshing shows I’ve seen in a long long while; and that’s sayin’ somethin’.  #imindeepdeeplikewiththisshow

For those of you living under a rock, the show I’m ranting about is ‘Scream Queens,’ a freshman series now airing on Fox, Tuesdays at 9pm PST created by Ryan Murphy (duh), Brad Falchuk and Ian Brennan (aka the mother freaking dream team of horror). This is a horror comedy program centered on a series of murders involving the Kappa Kappa Tau sorority (I can only speak for myself in saying this is one and only sorority I’d ever be down to pledge), our villain – The Red Devil, mysteries with babies in bathtubs, and some seriously amazing cinematic references.  I mean, there was a freaking ‘Jaws’ nod in the first half of the two hour series premier, ‘Hell Week.’ I geeked out so hard I thought I might have an aneurysm. Also a huge round of applause for the ‘Backstreets Back’ sequence. #mysideshurtfromlaughingsohard

What I love most about this show is as follows:

1) The Dialogue: In this week’s episode ‘Chainsaw’ our ears were gifted with sweet lines such as ‘I love this closet so much it’s like a second vagina to me … And you’ve just violated my closet Vag”. Solid. Gold. There are many others like this, so prepare your ears for a feast of tasty soundbites. #bowdowntothewriters #epicgenius

2) The Characters: THE CHARACTERS YOU GUYS!! I’m gonna go on record right here and now in proclaiming my eternal love for Chad Radwell, (played by Glen Powell). He’s the bro-iest bro of all time and he’s nailing it in more ways then one. He’s a nightmare for women and a nightmare for mankind but God in Heaven do I love him. Additional cast include the severely bad ass Jamie Lee Curtis as Dean Cathy Munsch, Skyler Samuels as Grace Gardner (I’m calling it, she’s going to be the token ‘last girl standing’), Lea Michele as Hester Ulrich/Chanel #6 (I smell a wildly inappropriate and trainwreck of a romance between her and Chad. Mark my words), and Emma Roberts as Chanel Oberlin; normally I think Roberts is a steaming pile of acting trash but Murphy seems to have hand tailored this role to Roberts and she’s rockin’ the sh*t out of it. Shout out to Niecy Nash as the non-gun carrying security guard Denise Hemphill and Keke Palmer as Zayday Williams with arguably the most legit grandma ever (the women gives her granddaughter chainsaws as gifts. Fantastic and poignant).  #iloveyouchadradwell #causetheirdopeandtheydodopeshit

3) The Clothes: I know I’m a chick but I think both men and women can appreciate the plethora of amazing threads showcased here. I mean the Chanels are singlehandedly making me question what I’ve been doing with my life were I don’t own / wear outfits like theirs. I mean for real guys, what have I been doing with my life? #poorlifedecisions #helpmeimpoor

4) The Tone: This is a show that isn’t afraid to make fun of itself or anyone else for that matter. They literally leave no stone unturned when it comes to poking fun at the genere so near and dear to my heart, and it just makes me pleased as punch that satire is not dead, but well and alive here. Murphy’s ‘American Horror Story’ can force-feed you the heavy broodyness that it’s trying to convey, so it’s so refreshing to have a horror comedy that is exactly that and nothing more. #leanintothatsatire #whysoseriousahs’

5) The Reality: The reality that is the social media hellscape we’re all living in. The death scene of Chanel #2 (played by Ariana Grande) is breathtaking and a perfect depiction of today’s millennials addiction with posting every single thing on every form of social media known to man. I mean she’s literally being murdered by the Red Devil and doesn’t even really try to defend herself because she’s too busy posting online about her murder, as it’s taking place in real time. This is comedic genius, plain and simple. #omgicanteven #blahblahblah #imold

6) The Deaths: Already I cant wait to see who drops next and how. So funny. So inventive. #iliterallydie #pleasekillme

I know this isn’t really a recap of the show but I don’t want to begin doing that until I know in my heart of hearts that you, gentle readers, are  binge watching the first two episodes and formulate your own deeply rooted crush on this show.  Starting next week it’s spoiler city so hunker down into that couch of yours, stop Netflix and Chilling, and get on with it.