If you missed the finale of ‘Game of Thrones,’ I just have one thing to ask you – how could you possibly do that? Alright, alright – missing it isn’t the end of the world, of course. There was so much action, so many plot twists that if you haven’t seen it by now you need to make arrangements to watch it for yourself because it’s phenomenal – plain and simple.
You’ll remember last week that Joffrey had Ned killed. Well, the young king decided that wasn’t enough, so he took his head and stuck it on a spike. Then he takes Sansa outside and forces her to gaze upon it. But before doing so, he reminds her that once she reaches womanhood she’ll be having lots of sex with the boy who killed her father. I can see how that’d be a real turn on. And if that’s not enough, Joffrey tells her that he’s going to put Robb’s head on a spike too.
Sansa’s reply? “Or maybe he’ll give me yours.” Beautifully executed, Sansa.
Of course a King is never supposed to hit his lady. Kill her father, yes. Hit her, never. So he has his knight do it. After the smackdown, Sansa notices that Joffrey’s standing above a ledge with no rail. Just as she moves closer to push him off, the Hound steps in and stops her. He pretends to wipe blood from her mouth, but it’s evident he knew what she was scheming.
Meanwhile, in the castle we find Cersei intimately involved with yet another family member – this time, her cousin Lancel. Seriously, are there no good men in Westeros other than her own family members for her to bed, or does no one else but her own kin find her attractive? Lannincest. That’s my new word.
There’s not really much to report here. Jon was conflicted about leaving, and did actually do so but his friends hunted him down. Instead of letting him do what he wanted, they convinced him to come back. I would’ve liked to see Jon leave. I know that means beheading, but what a waste of a tall, dark and handsome young man to have him wasting away a virgin guarding the Wall. Just doesn’t seem fair. At least he had a chance of getting some before the Night Watch captured him again. Now, he’s sentenced to virgindom again.
News of Ned’s death has reached Catelyn and Robb. He takes out his fury on a tree, and thus ruins his sword. He vows to his mother that he’ll kill them all; she gently reminds him that they need to save the girls first, then kill them all. Even in moments of grief, it’s always good to have your priorities straight.
Catelyn then confronts Jaime and he actually admits to not only pushing Bran out the window but trying to kill him as well. When she asks why, he doesn’t respond. Oh come on! You told her that much, haven’t you? Tell her the rest already.
Back at the Lannister camp, they, too, are disappointed by the news of Ned’s death but for much lesser reasons. As Tyrion points out, negotiating peace with Robb is now impossible thanks to Joffrey’s hotheadedness (which I’m pretty sure can be blamed on too many genes from the same pool).
His father finally sees value and worth in Tyrion and decides to appoint him as Hand to Joffrey. The catch is that he cannot take his prostitute friend, yet he doesn’t listen and takes her anyway.
The one character who couldn’t give a you-know-what about Ned’s death is Dany. Having to contend with the death of her son and now the permanent disability of her husband, she has much more to contend with than any of the other players in the ‘Game of Thrones.’
She confronts the witch and finds out that she knew what would happen and did this on purpose to kill her unborn child and husband. Dany is beside herself with anger but first she must focus on Drogo. She asks him if he’ll recover, and the witch replies, “When the sun rises in the west.” So basically, never.
Poor Drogo. He’s unresponsive. She tries anything she can to get him to come to, but it’s not happening. So since there’s no nursing homes or anything, she does the only thing she can – she puts a pillow over his face and suffocates him. Understandable, I think.
His funeral pyre is built, and the witch is tied to it. Dany places the dragon eggs around Drogo, and confronts the witch. The pyre is lit, and despite Jorah’s pleas, she walks into the flames. The witch’s screams are heard.
Check out this next scene. In the morning, the crowd wakes up and finds Dany in the midst of the ashes. She’s sitting there, alive. And what else do we see? Baby dragons! A green one’s on her lap. A red one’s on her shoulder. And yet there’s another one as well. Dragons are all powerful and now she has three of her own. Everyone there bows down to her in reverence. Now she’s a serious contender for the Iron Throne.
And now we have to wait almost a year to see more. Of course we can buy the books, but then the surprise is spoiled for those of us (like myself) who are experiencing the story for the first time.